I have always held a deep fascination and fondness for swords.  I think this is an obsession shared by most children of the male gender; give two boys each a stick and they'll be whacking at each other before you can say <i>en garde</i>.  Hell, give just <i>one</i> of the boys a stick and the same is likely true.

I have always wanted to own a sword (or three).  I've also always wanted to learn how to use one properly, but that's a secondary concern; a true geek can always fake such knowledge.

And yes, I am a geek.  I fought it for awhile, but now that I'm older I can admit it with ease.  I know I'm a geek because I have been to a Renaissance Festival more than once.  If you go just once, you can still gain the benefit of non-geek doubt by explaining your presence away with a litany of excuses: my girlfriend wanted to go; I heard there was a lot of cleavage; I got confused and thought it was a bizarre garage sale; my friends and I got drunk and found ourselves there without remembering how.

But if you willingly go back (no matter what the excuse), you are a confirmed geek.

I've been to four, including going twice this year.  The first time was with my now ex-wife several years ago.  She wanted to go in order to scope out Celtic Knot jewelry.  I wanted to go because I liked swords.  I don't remember much about that one (including where, exactly, it was).  I remember being disappointed that the advertised jousting was already done for the day.

My girlfriend and I have been to the Harveysburg, Ohio Ren Faire each of the past three years (including this one).  We went the first time for similar reasons to the one I don't remember much; more out of curiosity than anything else.  We had a great time, though; some of the shows were simply hilarious and the atmosphere was great.  We saw the jousting, which fun until someone was got un-horsed; then it wasn't as fun anymore.  Lots of people were in full medieval / renaissance costumes.  The staff/actors stayed in character even outside of their scheduled events and little mini-events happened randomly, such as a witch trial that started and resolved seemingly out of the blue.  We just happened to be in the right spot at the right time to see it.

We had such a good time we decided to go back the next year.  And in doing so, we raised our level of geekness by a large margin by dressing up.  A bit.  Official costumes are crazy expensive, so we just supplemented what we had with things bought at thrift stores to make renaissance -ish outfits.  I wore a linen shirt with an old chef's shirt that we cut the sleeves from to make it into a vest.  A bandana and a couple of other minor accoutrements later, and I made for a passable pirate-y guy (as one person referred to me).  The faire was even more fun when in costume, and was heightened further when my girlfriend bought me a scimitar.  At last!  I had a sword!  Never mind that fighting with said sword would be out of the question; I can't imagine that a $25.00 weapon would hold up in an actual battle, even if I had someone <i>to</i> battle.

This year the geek bar was raised exponentially; we bought patterns and material and had a woman at work who knows how to sew make outfits for us.  On top of that, we found a place online that sells good quality kilts for a reasonable price.  And that's one of the reasons we ended up going twice this year.  The first time was Highlander Day, so I wore my kilt (I'll never tell) and took part in the Highlander Games.  I threw a caber.  Well, a lighter, baby caber-let, but still.  I didn't throw it well, since I didn't realize it was supposed to go end-over-end.  I'll know next year, though.  I also took part in the stone throw, which is much like shot-putting, but you can't move your feet.  None of the other contestants knew how to use their legs to throw, so I actually won that event.  Woo-hoo!  I gave the resulting prize, a carved stone, to my girlfriend, and it sits on her mantle now.

We went again yesterday because the outfits the lady from work made were complete.  And we hadn't seen everything we wanted to see during Highlander Week because the highlander stuff took up much of the time.

More tomorrow, if I get around to it.  Find me on Facebook to see pictures.

Looking through the archives of my old posts, I'm struck by the old idiom "the more things

change, the more they stay the same".  I'm at the same weight I was when I started the 'eat

healthy' diet back in 2006. I did, in fact, lose lots of weight -- I was down to 187 for awhile

-- but gained it all back in a bout of depression that lasted about a year.  I left my wife,

started and finished re-dating an old high school girlfriend, moved into two different

apartments, started dating the woman of my dreams, got divorced (I know, that seems out of

order.  The lawyer was verrrrrry slow.), and got a kilt.

 

And yet I am the same person I was then.  Slightly overweight, too lazy to do anything about it;

not in school, but making plans to resume; trying to motivate myself to write more often, but

seldom doing so.

 

That last one isn't completely true.  I've actually been writing quite a bit, but it's nothing

that anyone but me would be remotely interested in; I really doubt there is any viable market

for someone's pretend newspaper articles regarding a digital PS2 college football team, no

matter how many times they win the (extra) fake national title.

 

I also started a couple of other blogs.  One of them got waaaay too personal and I deleted it. 

The other was going to be my dreams (the sleeping kind, not my plans), but I never get around to

writing them down.

 

So my life is very different from what it was, and yet it is very much the same as it has always

been.  I guess idioms exist because they're generally true.

 

The boys and I have been on a bit of a Narnia binge lately.  I got "Prince Caspian" on Blu-Ray (for $10.00!  It's about time BR prices came down) and we've watched it several times, and we just finished listening to "The Last Battle" in the car.

I literally cried the first time I saw the Walden/Disney version of "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe", simply because it was so true to the book.  I was stunned.  I wish they had been in charge of the Lord of the Rings movies (yes, yes, they were great, but what were the hobbits doing in Osgilliath?  And Faramir is a completely different person in the movie than in the book.  And they completely screwed up Aragorn's...oh never mind). 

"Prince Caspian" was well done also.  However, I've heard that Caspian did not do as well financially as was projected; I hope that doesn't forestall the making of the rest.

The next book in the series, if I remember correctly, is "Voyage of the Dawn Treader" which I would guess would be the most expensive of the books to adapt.  Most of it is set on water, which makes for a difficult and expensive set, and there is a dragon involved (although I suppose CGI makes that less of a challenge than in the past).  If they can get past that movie, the rest should be relatively easy to make.

Another issue is the stories themselves.  C.S. Lewis made no secret about the books being Christian allegories, and he can sometimes become a bit heavy-handed.  Further, VDT reads a bit like vignettes instead of a whole; they get on the boat and visit a series of islands, each with a separate little adventure.  They movie-makers have done a fabulous job of casting thus far; hopefully that continues, since the part of Eustace can be a bit touchy and if the actor is not careful he's liable to overplay the part.

Thinking of the Narnia books made me wonder if someone would attempt to make Lewis' space trilogy books as well, but then I realized that would not be possible.  Specifically, "Perelandra" would be impossible to make without an R rating since all of the characters are naked throughout (it's a parallel of Adam and Eve, with the part of Eden played by the planet Venus).  The physical movie would be makeable; the quelling of Ransom's sin nature would not be translatable.

These Poets Are Not so Dead

I was going through folders at work and came across one marked “Backups”. It contained several old files that I had completely forgotten about. I thought I’d share a couple of them with whatever readers might still check this blog.

This is an assignment for an English class I took a few years ago. Enjoy!

These Poets Are Not so Dead

1 There seems to be much confusion regarding the movie Dead Poets Society. This confusion stems from the placement of Robin Williams’ name at the head of the cast, when his character plays nothing more than a supporting role in the film. Many noted experts and critics have wasted wads of paper picking apart his performance, while all the time missing the real point to the movie. It is not about Williams’ Professor Keating. Nor is the key conflict between Neil and his father, as some have suggested. The father and Professor Keating are both catalysts to, not participants of, the central story. At its heart, Dead Poets Society is about two young students named Todd Anderson and Neil Perry

2 Neil, played by Robert Sean Leonard in the best performance of his career, is an outgoing, charismatic student who has everything going for him. Todd, played by the incomparable Ethan Hawke, is just the opposite; he’s shy, reserved, and timid. Their lives are jostled by the entrance of Professor Keating, a new English teacher, played by a remarkably subdued Williams, whose lessons on questioning the world around them bring about a weaving juxtaposition of the boys’ lives. Strong willed Neil badgers the unwilling Todd into joining a secret society, and Todd tumbles along in Neil’s unflappable wake. Yet this same irrepressible nature leads Neil into a confrontation with the one man he cannot win against – his overbearing father.

3 The tragic ending to Neil’s dilemma brings the two boys’ circle to a completion. In the end, the irrepressible Neil cracks and succumbs to despair, and it’s the meek and mild Todd who proves to be the stronger of the two.

4 Noted critic Roger Ebert of the Chicago Sun-Times spends much time berating the realism of the film. When Professor Keating adopts the diction of John Wayne and Marlon Brando, Ebert sees it only as Robin Williams slipping from his character and improvising a stage act. But what better way for a teacher to reach an audience of teenagers who couldn’t care less about poetry than to link the subject to their heroes of stage and screen? Williams’s characterizations of Brando and Wayne were completely valid within the context of a teacher trying to reach a youthful audience of the fifties. At another point, Ebert writes, “The society's meetings have been badly written and are dramatically shapeless, featuring a dance line to Lindsay's ‘The Congo’…”(C2)^[1] They’re teenagers! Of course they make a dance out of a catchy refrain! What would be more natural? The boys aren’t in this for the poetry – they’re in it for the rebellion.

The writing in this film is remarkable for its reality and depth. When Professor Keating exhorted the boys to “seize the day” and “make your lives extraordinary”, I wanted to turn off the movie and start doing something more meaningful with my day right then. Only popcorn and laziness kept me on the couch.

Not all parts of the film work as smoothly as the main flow. There is a clunky romantic side story between Knox Overstreet (Josh Charles) and a girl from the local public high school that goes nowhere and accomplishes nothing except to fill space and time. Many of the lesser characters are basically moving background pieces, stereotypical characters who exist solely to fill in just because it would look weird for the school to have only four students.

These minor setbacks do not detract from the emotional validity of the film as a whole. There is a powerful lesson taught in this film, and an insight into the human psyche that strikes very near the core of our own reality.

Greg Oden for President! Oh, Wait...

The box score says that last weekend Greg Oden scored 29 points in an Ohio State win over Iowa. Many media types pointed to this as another sign of the dominance of the seven-footer. I just don’t know if I agree.

I was at that game, and I have to say that Greg didn’t appear to be overly dominant. It’s not like he was getting feeds into the post and then overpowering people to get to the basket. The vast majority of his points came from easy put-back dunks off of sloppy slashes to the basket by OSU’s guards. So I give Greg credit for positioning and timing, but he didn’t exactly have to channel Wilt Chamberlin to make those shots. The most impressive thing he did that game is make all of his left-handed free throws. He has clearly put a lot of work into those. (Paying attention, Shaq? See what a little bit of practice can do?)

Oden is a defensive force. There’s no doubt that he makes life more difficult for opponents by clogging up the lane and redirecting shots. One of the local media guys said he makes it easier for Ohio State’s guards to be aggressive on defense because he’ll be there to cover for any mistakes they make. And for the most part, that is true. That being said, just five years ago people were saying the exact same things about Ken Johnson. You know, the guy who (I think) still holds the Big Ten record for career blocked shots. Not much of an offensive game. Presumably enjoying an extended European vacation right now.

That’s about the level Greg is at. Well, I don’t recall Kenny ever getting 29 points – he was generally lucky to break 10 – even off of put-backs and free throws. Then again, Scoonie Penn and Michael Redd were a little less out of control than the current group. The point is that, at this point in his career, Greg doesn’t appear to be much more dominating than a guy who was drafted in the second round and never got a whiff of the NBA. I can’t even imagine how Greg would be doing in the NBA had be been able to forgo college last year. If he has difficulty defending Big Ten centers, what’s going to happen when he’s up against Tim Duncan?

To be fair, he is still nursing his wrist. He hasn’t been completely healthy all year. He might not be in playing shape yet, considering the way he was plodding up and down the court. Or maybe I’m expecting too much. Maybe when someone talks about a “once in a decade” type of center, they mean a guy who is great on defense and can jam the ball when he gets the opportunity on offense. I guess I was just expecting something more.

What a Spring

Hi everyone. It’s been a great Spring for me so far. Near the end of March I developed a 6.3mm kidney stone that had me hospitalized for three days and then off work (and on Percocet) for another week. The damn thing was too large to pass so I got a $6000 procedure called a Lithotripsy (thank you, God, for insurance!) that blasted it into smaller pieces, which all came out over the course of the following week.

The only good part was that, after being forced to eat hospital food for three days, nearly everything I tried to eat for the next two weeks made me feel nauseous. I lost six pounds and have, therefore, lost a total of 27 ½ pounds this year.

A week and a half after I was finally able to go back to work, I…um…broke my heel. Or ruptured my Achilles tendon. Well, not that, either.

Here’s what happened: I was playing football with the boys, just running straight, when I felt what I thought was a rock hitting my heel. I heard a distinct “pop” as I tumbled to the ground. Once I had sat back up, I discovered a) there weren’t any rocks in the vicinity and b) my heel hurt like hell. Especially after I stood and walked on it.

I gave it 24 hours to heal itself (which didn’t happen) then went to the ER. They x-rayed it and called it a “Calcaneus Avulsion Fracture”. This, it turned out, was incorrect. According to the orthopedic surgeon they sent me to, at some point in the past I severly injured my Achilles tendon and, not realizing the degree of damage, I never allowed it to heal. It kept getting re-injured until my body got tired of all the internal bleeding and calcified it, effectively turning nearly half of my Achilles tendon into not-so-supple and rather brittle bone.

That’s what broke.

I know what you’re thinking: how did I fail to notice such severe damage to my Achilles tendon? My answer: I don’t know. I don’t remember any severe injuries to it, but after thinking it over, I do remember having what I thought at the time was a case of Plantar Fasciitis, which is a swelling of the tendon that runs from the heel to the toes.

Let this be a lesson to you: NEVER SELF-DIAGNOSE! Unless you went to medical school.

So now I’m stuck at home until at least May 26th. And I will have to have surgery at some point, although that probably won’t be until next year when I have some Leave of Absence time built back up at work. In the meantime I have nearly written several times, almost done some serious studying for the A+ exam, and played a lot of NCAA football on the PS2. Duke (I like controlling weak teams to increase the challenge -- it's more fun to build a loser into a winner than to take over, say, Ohio State and win with a roster already loaded with talent) won the national championship last year and is going for two in a row tonight. Just in case you’re wondering.

Lastly, Krista (see link to the right) graciously allowed my to critique a short story she wrote for school. It was really good. I hope to read it again as a novel in the near future. ;)

A Quick Assignment

I don't usually do these, and I certainly won't force anyone else to; I have few enough readers as it is. But Tammy posted a "meme", or whetever they're called, and I did it, so I'll pass along my results and the link.

Go to www.wikapedia.com . Type in your birthdate (month and day only) and post 3 interesting things that have happened on your birthday, 2 important births, and 2 important deaths.

February 17

Events:
1600 - Philosopher Giordano Bruno was burnt alive at Campo de' Fiori in Rome, charged of heresy.

1895 - Swan Lake, with music by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, is first performed at full length in Saint Petersburg, Russia.

1992 - A court in Milwaukee, Wisconsin sentences serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer to life in prison.

Births:
1490 - Charles III, Duke of Bourbon, Constable of France (d. 1527)

1963 - Michael Jordan, American basketball player

Deaths:
364 - Jovian, Roman Emperor

1909 - Geronimo, Apache leader (b. 1829)