I have always held a deep fascination and fondness for swords.  I think this is an obsession shared by most children of the male gender; give two boys each a stick and they'll be whacking at each other before you can say <i>en garde</i>.  Hell, give just <i>one</i> of the boys a stick and the same is likely true.

I have always wanted to own a sword (or three).  I've also always wanted to learn how to use one properly, but that's a secondary concern; a true geek can always fake such knowledge.

And yes, I am a geek.  I fought it for awhile, but now that I'm older I can admit it with ease.  I know I'm a geek because I have been to a Renaissance Festival more than once.  If you go just once, you can still gain the benefit of non-geek doubt by explaining your presence away with a litany of excuses: my girlfriend wanted to go; I heard there was a lot of cleavage; I got confused and thought it was a bizarre garage sale; my friends and I got drunk and found ourselves there without remembering how.

But if you willingly go back (no matter what the excuse), you are a confirmed geek.

I've been to four, including going twice this year.  The first time was with my now ex-wife several years ago.  She wanted to go in order to scope out Celtic Knot jewelry.  I wanted to go because I liked swords.  I don't remember much about that one (including where, exactly, it was).  I remember being disappointed that the advertised jousting was already done for the day.

My girlfriend and I have been to the Harveysburg, Ohio Ren Faire each of the past three years (including this one).  We went the first time for similar reasons to the one I don't remember much; more out of curiosity than anything else.  We had a great time, though; some of the shows were simply hilarious and the atmosphere was great.  We saw the jousting, which fun until someone was got un-horsed; then it wasn't as fun anymore.  Lots of people were in full medieval / renaissance costumes.  The staff/actors stayed in character even outside of their scheduled events and little mini-events happened randomly, such as a witch trial that started and resolved seemingly out of the blue.  We just happened to be in the right spot at the right time to see it.

We had such a good time we decided to go back the next year.  And in doing so, we raised our level of geekness by a large margin by dressing up.  A bit.  Official costumes are crazy expensive, so we just supplemented what we had with things bought at thrift stores to make renaissance -ish outfits.  I wore a linen shirt with an old chef's shirt that we cut the sleeves from to make it into a vest.  A bandana and a couple of other minor accoutrements later, and I made for a passable pirate-y guy (as one person referred to me).  The faire was even more fun when in costume, and was heightened further when my girlfriend bought me a scimitar.  At last!  I had a sword!  Never mind that fighting with said sword would be out of the question; I can't imagine that a $25.00 weapon would hold up in an actual battle, even if I had someone <i>to</i> battle.

This year the geek bar was raised exponentially; we bought patterns and material and had a woman at work who knows how to sew make outfits for us.  On top of that, we found a place online that sells good quality kilts for a reasonable price.  And that's one of the reasons we ended up going twice this year.  The first time was Highlander Day, so I wore my kilt (I'll never tell) and took part in the Highlander Games.  I threw a caber.  Well, a lighter, baby caber-let, but still.  I didn't throw it well, since I didn't realize it was supposed to go end-over-end.  I'll know next year, though.  I also took part in the stone throw, which is much like shot-putting, but you can't move your feet.  None of the other contestants knew how to use their legs to throw, so I actually won that event.  Woo-hoo!  I gave the resulting prize, a carved stone, to my girlfriend, and it sits on her mantle now.

We went again yesterday because the outfits the lady from work made were complete.  And we hadn't seen everything we wanted to see during Highlander Week because the highlander stuff took up much of the time.

More tomorrow, if I get around to it.  Find me on Facebook to see pictures.

Idioms for Idiots

Looking through the archives of my old posts, I'm struck by the old idiom "the more things

change, the more they stay the same".  I'm at the same weight I was when I started the 'eat

healthy' diet back in 2006. I did, in fact, lose lots of weight -- I was down to 187 for awhile

-- but gained it all back in a bout of depression that lasted about a year.  I left my wife,

started and finished re-dating an old high school girlfriend, moved into two different

apartments, started dating the woman of my dreams, got divorced (I know, that seems out of

order.  The lawyer was verrrrrry slow.), and got a kilt.

 

And yet I am the same person I was then.  Slightly overweight, too lazy to do anything about it;

not in school, but making plans to resume; trying to motivate myself to write more often, but

seldom doing so.

 

That last one isn't completely true.  I've actually been writing quite a bit, but it's nothing

that anyone but me would be remotely interested in; I really doubt there is any viable market

for someone's pretend newspaper articles regarding a digital PS2 college football team, no

matter how many times they win the (extra) fake national title.

 

I also started a couple of other blogs.  One of them got waaaay too personal and I deleted it. 

The other was going to be my dreams (the sleeping kind, not my plans), but I never get around to

writing them down.

 

So my life is very different from what it was, and yet it is very much the same as it has always

been.  I guess idioms exist because they're generally true.